


Drunk Words Sober Thoughts

by MissDrarryDawn



Series: Drunk On Love [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drarry, Drinking, Gay, Love, M/M, Patronus, PostWar, War, drunkdraco, friends - Freeform, friendsfallinlove
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 04:44:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20465210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissDrarryDawn/pseuds/MissDrarryDawn
Summary: After the war has past, Draco Malfoy has taken to drinking to drown his sorrows. One evening, he stumbles drunk into the shared Eighth-year common room, slurring and stumbling. Luckily for him, a certain someone had happened to be there at the time, willing to help him.//Completed//Word count: 8.2k





	Drunk Words Sober Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> I'm new here, still figuring everything out, please be gentle with me.

After the war, what little of the eighth years that have returned were all grouped into one house, McGonagall figuring it would be good for them to stick together after the horrors they went through. This was fine with everyone, no one had any reason to care about such trivial matters anymore. After escaping with their lives, they started to view things differently. Harry sat in front of the fire one night, reading, when he heard a loud clamor. What? He stretched his neck out to see what was causing so much noise. It was...Malfoy? He was stumbling through the door, seemingly wavering left then right, smacking into paintings who grumbled loudly. Oh my God Malfoy was drunk! Harry realized with a start. He stood up and walked around the sofa to stand in Malfoy's path, and as if he'd predicted it, the blonde crashed into him not a moment later. Harry grabbed him, steadying himself as he untangled their bodies and moved Malfoy to the couch.

"You're drunk off your arse." He stated when he sat down next to Malfoy.

"Yessssss.." He slurred, dragging out the word. Oh dear Merlin give me strength for this..Harry prayed silently.

"That's not good Malfoy." Harry continued stating the obvious.

"Yeppp" He replied once again, popping the 'p'. Harry sighed and spoke, though he knew he'd regret asking:

"Why?"

"Because it makes me forget.." Malfoy slurred again, staring into the fire, hiccuping occasionally. Harry sighed once again:

"There's always Obliviate." Harry commented, putting his book away. If the trauma was too much, it was a viable option to just wipe yourself clean, set yourself free. There were times where Harry had considered it too.

"I don't want to forget." Malfoy looked up at him, as if Harry was the one not making sense.

"Gods you're really drunk." Harry shook his head disapprovingly. "Cmon Malfoy. Up to bed with you." Harry stood and hoisted Malfoy up, half carrying him up the stairs to his dorm. As they entered Malfoy's room, Harry was ready to just drop him on the bed and leave it at that, but he noticed the blonde was fumbling with his buttons, attempting to unbutton his shirt, and failing miserably in his current state. Harry sighed again and approached Malfoy, knocking his hands away and unbuttoning his shirt for him.

"There. Jesus Christ you're not a child." He commented as Malfoy slipped his shirt off his shoulders. He was pale. Had a fair bit of muscle on him though.

"Go to bed. Honestly." Harry tssked. He was surprised the blonde git actually listened or heard him at all even. He dutifully laid down on his bed. Harry summoned some hangover potion and water for him on his nightstand, along with a note and left. He returned down to the common room and resumed reading, though his mind wasn't on the book in the slightest bit. He was glad each student was afforded their own room, as there weren't many of them, and they all wanted privacy. He stubbornly attempted to read his book again, but the words were slipping from his sight before he could register them. He groaned and tossed the book. Malfoy was becoming an alcoholic, which was lovely, neither Ron nor Hermione returned at all and Harry was utterly alone. The younger students crowded him sometimes, not able to understand what it was that actually happened and just singing blind praise to him, which was incredibly annoying. He understood now why Malfoy always used to sneer at him, pick fights etc. They were treating as if he was all that in a bag of chips but he never quite understood it while he was younger. He loved the attention, basked in the praise. After coming to Hogwarts from the Dursley's, who'd absolutely despised him, he lived for the love he was showered with. Made Harry sick now. Now he saw how blind it all was. He wanted to yell at any kid who would say they wanted to be like him. He wanted to yell at them how that was something they should least want in their entire life. But what was the point? They wouldn't understand. To them he was this hero, and no one else got the credit they deserved.

Malfoy didn't get any credit for saving Harry's life, neither did his mother, Hermione didn't get any credit for saving her parents by obliviating them, no, it was just him. He shook his head. Despite all the students that crowded around him, he felt lonelier than ever. The world was way too off balance now that Voldemort was gone. It was all either good or heading there, and there was not enough bad to balance it, and Harry hated it. Hated feeling so thrown off. He heard a loud screech from up above him that snapped him out of his reverie. He grabbed his wand and rushed up the stairs, terrified of what the hell was making that unholy screeching in the middle of the night. Once upstairs he followed the sound to Malfoy's room and he entered without qualms. He found the other sitting up in bed, gripping his forearm as he screeched and hissed in pain. Harry swallowed. What the hell was going on? He took a step closer and saw the snake in the Dark Mark writhing, in stark contrast to Malfoy's pale skin. Then it clicked. He was being released of the Mark. Since Voldemort had died, the Mark had nothing to pledge loyalty to, so it released whoever had taken it. Harry heard it was almost as painful as getting it, though he'd never know. Malfoy was rubbing at his forearm, the stupid ugly marking burning while it slowly faded and released him of being a Death Eater.

Harry sat down hesitantly next to Malfoy, unsure of what to do, not wanting to really leave either. Malfoy wasn't taking much notice to him anyways. Harry still had his new wand gripped tightly in his hand. Could he help Malfoy somehow? He wasn't sure if a spell existed to counter the pain of being released, though there might be a few that could lessen it. Harry wracked his brain while the boy next to him kept moaning in pain. A few popped into his head and he brought his wand up, pointing it at Malfoy's forearm, muttering the incantation:

"Minus Doloris."

Malfoy seemed surprised for a moment, that the fucking burning had simmered down. His arm didn't hurt as much. Harry knew this wouldn't last long enough, but now that Malfoy had stopped crying out, Harry could easily think of a good slew of spells that could maybe help him. The drunk blonde looked at Harry, for the first time realizing he was there:

"It's going away?" He asked, unsure of himself. Harry just nodded:

"Yeah. It's releasing you."

A hiss of pain and Harry's spell was out. He quickly thought of another:

"Lenire."

Malfoy settled down again. His shoulders swayed, still inebriated. Harry was glad the Mark was finally releasing Malfoy, at least everyone would stop giving him shit then. Harry had seen what Malfoy had to go through while on his hunt for Horcruxes occasionally, through Voldemort's eyes, and it was easily some of the most horrifying crap Harry had witnessed. It irked him how much shit Malfoy got, with no regard to how he was forced into taking the Mark, lest his entire family would have died. Harry's spell gave out and Malfoy whimpered again.

Harry kept casting spells for the rest of the night, never saying one word, just focusing on using good spells that could lessen the pain. After about an hour, Harry had noticed it had visibly faded, though it wasn't gone yet. As the hours drew on, Harry felt himself growing tired, but he stayed awake, forced himself to, he could always sleep after he'd helped Malfoy through this. The first rays of the cold morning slithered into the room, and by then, the Mark was nearly gone. Harry cast another spell, for the last stretch. He sat there silently as a loud hiss spread through the room, a green light shining out of Malfoy's forearm, floating upwards, finally pulling the Mark from his skin, once and for all. The light dispersed and disappeared and Harry smiled. He looked at Malfoy who was blinking dumbly at his forearm, before he smiled too and fell over, head landing in Harry's lap, falling right asleep, exhausted. The drink and the release had knocked him right out. Harry tucked his wand back into his robes, and adjusted Malfoy so that he lay in his own bed properly. After that, Harry left the room, barely stumbling to his own room and collapsing in bed, his exhaustion taking him over.

~

"Potter. Oi Potter!" A voice grumbled from some direction Harry could not pinpoint. He felt himself being shaken violently and he opened his eyes, squinting at the light. He reached for his glasses, adjusting them on his nose and sitting up, only then realizing Malfoy was standing over him, attempting to wake him up.

"Bloody hell let me sleep." Harry grumbled, but Malfoy wasn't budging.

"What happened last night Potter?" He asked, his voice surprisingly soft. Harry gestured for Malfoy to sit, as he had quite a bit to tell him. Yeah, quite a bit indeed. The blonde lowered himself onto the bed, poised.

"First off, you stumbled into the common room drunk off your arse, after that I took you up to bed and helped you with your shirt since you were so drunk you couldn't unbutton buttons and I left you to sleep. Left you a hangover potion because after getting that drunk, you were sure as hell going to need one."

Malfoy had flushed ever so slightly.

"I came back down to the common room, and minded my own business until I heard screeching from upstairs, so I rushed up there to see what the hell was going on. Turned out it was coming from your room. So I went in and.." Harry stopped, his voice softening as he spoke of the next part: "And you were being released from the Mark." Harry paused, scanning Malfoy's face for any reaction, but the blonde gave nothing away, as usual. "It obviously hurt like a bitch, so I sat down and cast pain reducing spells on you until the Mark released you, which took all night. By morning you were out cold and I came here to try to sleep too, until you so rudely woke me up."

"Potter I.." Malfoy trailed off. He was looking everywhere except at Harry. "I'm sorry and thank you. All that was real decent of you."

"It's okay, no problem . Couldn't you have waited until I woke up to have this chat though?" Harry mumbled, still rubbing his eyes.

"I..uhm..kind of panicked when I woke up and it wasn't..there. And I found your note so I kind of..broke in here..Sorry about that." Malfoy explained, clearing his throat, and stood up off the bed. "Again, thanks Potter." He exited Harry's room. Harry couldn't be bothered, all he wanted was to go back to sleep. Though after checking the time, he realized there was no point in trying to fall asleep again, classes started in half an hour. Harry groaned and went about his morning routine, and then off to class.

After all his lessons, Harry curled up in the common room with a book again. He found that reading helped with the constant nag of loneliness. He now understood why Hermione loved it so much. He felt like an ass for teasing her about it once upon a time. Loud noises snapped him away from his book once more. He had a suspicion who it was and as Malfoy stumbled into the firelight, his suspicions were confirmed. Though this time, Malfoy's lip was busted and his nose was bleeding. There was a bruise swelling over his cheek and his clothes were all roughed up and scrunched.

"Jesus Christ Malfoy." Harry gaped, and stood up, wrestling him down to sit on the couch, while he grabbed a soft cloth and soaked it in some water. He returned to the couch and sat opposite Malfoy, whose eyes were half-lidded and cloudy. He began to gently clean off the blood from his nose.

"For fucks sake Malfoy what did you do?"

"He insulted my mother." He slurred. Harry sighed:

"You better have beat him to a pulp. I will not accept this any other way."

"Oh I did. Got me banned from the Three Broomsticks though."

"Good. You shouldn't be drinking." Harry grumbled as he wiped away at the bruise, Malfoy wincing slightly but not moving away otherwise while Harry tapped the wet cloth to his swelling face.

"It's easier.." The blonde mumbled. Harry shook his head and started cleaning his lip. Malfoy hissed and flinched a few times, but Harry was able to get the job done:

"It's not easier Malfoy. Don't act dumb since I very well know you aren't. It's just more convenient than any other method. Doesn't mean it's good. You shouldn't do it."

"You sound like mum." Malfoy mumbled his eyes drooping. Harry smiled:

"Yes well, someone has to make sure you don't become an alcoholic. You're already a git, no need to add alcoholism to it."

"Heyyy..." Malfoy weakly protested, but he was falling asleep already, falling forwards, nearly toppling over Harry who realized with growing terror he had to carry Malfoy up to his room, or leave him down here. Leaving him down here wasn't good by any stretch of the imagination, because someone would undoubtedly attempt something funny. Carrying Malfoy was also a challenge. The guy was taller and lankier. Harry pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He stood up and tucked his arms around Malfoy, hoisting him up as if he was a sleeping bride. He wasn't as heavy as Harry assumed he'd be. He started walking up the stairs, minding not to hit Malfoy's head on anything. At one point, Harry felt Malfoy shift so that his face was hidden in Harry's chest.

"For Gods sake Malfoy. You really need to stop getting drunk." Harry mumbled and continued on, until he had Malfoy placed in his bed. Harry summoned another vial of hangover potion and a note. He shook his head at the stupid blonde idiot, and made his way out to his room. This was ridiculous. Why the hell was he taking care of Malfoy? Wasn't his responsibility. Then again, Harry knew only a rare few would help Malfoy if they encountered him drunk, and most would come down like vultures. Knowing this unsettled Harry. Better him than anyone else who had a bone to pick with the blonde. Yeah, that was fine. He crawled into his own bed and relaxed into the sheets, falling asleep quickly, though it was restless.

~

Tomorrow morning when Harry had seen Malfoy making his way down to the common room, he approached him.

"You need to stop drinking." Harry stated, startling Malfoy who seemed to have zoned off.

"I-" He started but his sentence wilted as he had nothing to say.

"And stop getting into bar fights." Harry added on. Malfoy just stared at him blankly:

"I don't remember anything from last night." He admitted, only recalling blurs, flashes and someone holding him tightly. How warm he felt. How nice they smelled. Fuck, he really needed to stop drinking himself into murky oblivion.

Harry recounted everything that had happened after Malfoy stumbled into the common room. The blonde looked embarrassed once more. He opened his mouth to say something, but Harry cut him off:

"Don't thank me. Don't apologize. Just don't do it again. You're not becoming an alcoholic this way. Or any way for that matter."

It was a reprimand, but Harry's voice was gentle. He walked away from Malfoy after saying that and disappeared into his first class.

~

After the lessons ended, Harry was making his way back to the common room, when he was joined by none other than Malfoy.

"Potter." He greeted curtly.

"Hi Malfoy." Harry greeted back. "What brings you to walk with the likes of me?" Harry smiled.

"You have literally been taking care of my drunk arse for the past two nights. Why do you think Potter?" Malfoy bit his lip to supress a smirk.

"Could it be? Could it be that you are grateful?" Harry faked shock.

"I had this whole thing I was going to say, but you don't deserve it anymore." Malfoy snickered.

"You'll see who'll take care of you next time you come to the common room drunk." Harry quipped. Malfoy shrugged:

"I won't. I don't want to." He pushed his hands into his pockets. Harry smiled pleasantly:

"That's good. I'm glad. And relieved. I don't have to nanny you anymore."

"I am not a child Potter." Malfoy protested.

"You couldn't unbutton your own shirt." Harry pointed out. Malfoy sputtered:

"My hand-eye coordination wasn't the best at the time." Just as he'd said that, he tripped over seemingly his own feet, and he would have face planted had Harry not caught him.

"I can see." Harry joked when he pulled the blonde to right himself.

"Shut up Potter. This never happened. You saw nothing." He threatened.

"My lips are sealed." Harry assured him.

They'd made it back to their common room and entered, settling in the corner of the couch. For a while neither said anything. There were a few other students milling around, mostly either glancing at Harry or giving Malfoy dirty looks.

"Literally everyone in here wants to shag you." Malfoy commented as he took notice of the secretive glances. Harry just gave a weak smile:

"Everyone includes you." He pointed out, a shit-eating grin on his face.

"Oh my Gods Potter you know that's not what I meant--" He flushed.

"I wouldn't shag more than half of them." Harry commented, ignoring Malfoy's sputtering.

"High standards?" The blonde inquired.

"Not exactly." Harry bit his lip. Not enough attractive guys came back.

"What it is then?" The blonde asked, looking at his fingernails.

"Not enough attractive guys came back." Harry replied. So what if Malfoy knew he was gay? Nothing. It wasn't a big deal.

"Wait Potter. You're gay?"

"Yep Malfoy."

"Cool." The blonde shrugged. "So, who'd you shag given the chance?"

Harry observed the guys who returned. He listed a few names, though they all seemed quite bland.

"What about you Malfoy?" Harry asked. Malfoy listed off a few names as well, guys too, though his expression remained bored. Harry nearly laughed. He was talking about who he'd shag with this guy who he'd considered to be his arch nemesis once. How ironical it was that they'd become somewhat of friends. It only took us a bloody war.. Harry cackled at himself.

"What's so funny Potter?"

"It only took us a bloody war to talk civilly."

"It's because you were so damn stubborn. I mean who wouldn't want to shake my hand!"

"To be fair, you were being kind of a prat."

Suddenly, Harry stuck his hand out for a handshake and grinned like he was 11 again.

"Wow Potter." Draco muttered but accepted his hand and shook it.

"Am I officially forgiven for my heinous crime?" Harry asked. Malfoy reached over and ruffled Harry's hair:

"I'll forgive you when your hair stops looking like a rat's nest. Which is never."

Harry only hummed in response, an idea popping into his head. That so Malfoy? You'll eat those words, Harry decided.

They stayed down talking for a while longer, before climbing up to their rooms. Bidding each other good night, they entered their rooms and snuggled into beds, out like a light in a moment.

~

When Draco came down to the common room next morning, he nearly went into cardiac arrest. The sight on the couch was quite possibly the worst or best thing he'd ever seen in his life, though he wasn't quite sure which it was yet. Potter was calmly sitting, reading, pretending not to notice Draco, acting all innocent. Bastard. His hair was all combed out and split properly, even gelled up a little.

"What is the meaning of this?" Draco asked, staring at the unsettling sight of Potter with normal, tamed hair for once. Potter just looked up at him and grinned crookedly:

"You said you'd forgive me when my hair stopped looking like a rat's nest."

Draco smiled despite himself:

"You've lost your marbles."

"Yep. You're legally obligated to forgive me now though." Harry replied, his fringe falling into his eyes.

"Am not. I'll claim Imperio." Draco shrugged, still standing over Potter on the couch. The bastard was still grinning:

"Alright. Go back on your words. At least I'll have fabulous hair for a day." He half-shrugged, going back to his book, as if Draco wasn't standing right next to him. The blonde scowled and reached down, messing up all of Harry's hard work.

"Hey!" The offended boy smacked Malfoy's hand away. "What was that for?" He pouted.

"I am not letting you leave here with better hair than mine." Draco shifted his weight.

"Oh so you admit it looked good then?" The Golden Boy smirked.

"I'd never. Get up now, we'll be late for class." Draco patted his shoulder and turned away to head to his first lesson.

~

Harry was quite honestly surprised Malfoy didn't stumble in drunk into the common room at an ungodly hour like the previous two nights. He'd been waiting on the couch dutifully, just in case. However, when Malfoy stepped into the common room, he appeared to be able to walk in a straight line.

"Not drunk are you?" Harry asked, observing him carefully.

"Nope. Perfectly sober. Why? Were you waiting?" He shot back, crossing the distance to the couch in two elegant strides.

"Better me than anyone else." Harry shrugged. The blonde just barely bristled:

"Well, you can return to your room, as I am not inebriated."

Harry shrugged again and stared into the fire. Malfoy shifted on the couch next to him, though said nothing. Harry wanted to say something, if only to break the awkward air, though no words came to him, so he stubbornly stared into the fire, racking his brain for something to say. Drunk Malfoy was easy to deal with. Sober Malfoy was a different story.

"You're easier to handle when drunk." Harry said, surprising himself. It was something at least, too late to go back on it now anyways.

"Am I now?" Malfoy inquired, his voice just that bit strained.

"Yeah. You stumble around and pass out pretty quickly. It's endearing in it's own way." Harry explained, left out the part about the few things he'd slurred over the two nights.

"Right. Do I talk much?" Malfoy asked, attempting to sound casual about it, but Harry felt the undertone of worry.

"No, not really. I don't think you even knew who I was, to be honest." Harry lied with a pleasant smile. Malfoy's dignity didn't need any more battering.

"Oh shut it Potter, as if you've never gotten drunk before." Malfoy shot back, embarrassed.

"I haven't." Harry shrugged. He never really saw the appeal of alcohol. He'd tried it a few times, but he'd learned he was an extreme lightweight and so, strayed away from it. "'M a lightweight." He mumbled.

"That must have been fun."

Harry snorted:

"Hermione had kittens when she smelled it on my breath." He couldn't help but chortle at the fond memory. "Ron just laughed at me while I attempted to enter a painting. The Fat Lady was horrified."

Malfoy chuckled. "Traumatizing paintings, eh Potter?"

Harry nodded. "My new occupation. Sod saving the Wizarding world."

"What I'd have given to see Harry Potter drunk." The blonde muttered to himself, though Harry overheard him.

"I looked good, for your information." He spoke snottily, attempting to sell the 'stuck-up' act.

"I don't doubt that, however I don't think you understand what fodder it would have been for me to see you attempting to climb into a painting."

"Prick." Harry rolled his eyes, though his smile betrayed him.

"I have one." Malfoy shrugged, smirking. Harry bristled, not sure how to reply to that, as unwelcome images sailed through his head. He shook his head at himself and merely snorted in response.

"Eloquent as always." Malfoy sighed, standing up. "Be as it may, I will be going. Goodnight Potter." He muttered, heading for the stairs.

"Night Draco." Harry called back, unaware of having addressed Malfoy by his first name for the very first time.

~

And so, months passed by, Draco and Harry growing to become quite good friends. They spent most of their time between classes together, talking about anything and everything. Even the war, hard as those occasional conversations were. They were getting odd looks, though no one really attempted to say anything, remembering that Harry hexed the last poor sod who made a comment so bad he ended up in the hospital wing for a week. They were both left alone for the most part. Not even the younger students bothered Harry as much as before, as he had Malfoy with him almost all of the time. Both of them were fine with being left to their own devices, enough for each other. Draco had grown strangely protective of Harry, and Harry had grown strangely trusting of Malfoy. They'd helped each other in schoolwork, though both knew Harry was a lost cause when it came to Potions. Though Draco wasn't perfect either, as Harry had been attempting to teach him how to cast a Patronus for a week now, that being their most recent assignment, and Draco had worked himself into quite a frenzy, as he didn't really have one. Harry was more than willing to help him, but it seemed the blonde had a very hard time dredging up a happy enough memory. He'd gotten close a few times, but never enough to actually cast a Patronus. They always practiced in the Room Of Requirements, where no one could bother them or interrupt. Despite the smell of smoke that seemed to forever linger in the room, it was the safest place for them to work.

Currently Draco was slumped against the wall, brows furrowed as he thought hard about something, anything. Harry stood across from him, waiting patiently. He'd learned a lot about the blonde over the months, and knew he hadn't had the happiest life, but surely there was a happy memory strong enough to pull of a Patronus. Surely. Had to be. Harry refused to believe there was nothing. He refused to give up. The raven knew his stubbornness was going to be the death of him eventually, but goddammit he was going to pull a Patronus out of Malfoy if it was the last thing he did.

Draco was trying his best to concentrate on all the happy times in his life, all the best moments, he pulled them into his head and focused so hard on channeling them into a Patronus, but each time he spoke the incantation, nothing came out. Absolutely fucking nothing.

"This is hopeless." He muttered, kicking at the floor.

"It's not. There's got to be something Draco." Harry assured, standing his ground.

"Even if there is, I don't know what it is Harry. It's hopeless." Draco scowled.

"Let's switch tactics then. Stop trying to think of a specific memory. Instead, try to focus on feelings. Even if you can't picture what exactly happened, think of how you felt." Harry suggested.

Draco nodded, a memory immediately springing into his mind. The pictures and events were a blur, but he could clearly remember how he'd felt. Relaxed, warm, safe. He remembered how tightly he was held, yet gently at the same time, like he was this important, precious thing worth taking care of. He remembered how nice everything smelled too, disorienting him for a moment, making him blissfully drowsy. His face flushed, realizing he thought back to how Harry carried him up to his room when he'd stumbled in drunk into the common room.

"Expecto Patronum." He whispered, the hum of the memory swathing his whole body in a pleasant tingle. A light sprung from his wand, swirling around the room before shaping up into a..tortoise. A tortoise. Draco stared dumbly at the large tortoise slowly walking around the room, not quite believing his eyes. He looked up at Harry, who had the largest, brightest grin on his face that Draco had ever seen.

"You did it! Oh my God Draco you did it! You cast a Patronus!" Harry squealed, bouncing on his heels. A smile broke out on Draco's face:

"I did it. I actually did it." He spoke, he couldn't believe it. A body crashed into him, throwing him off balance for a moment, though he regained composure while Harry hugged him tightly. He laughed breathlessly and wrapped his arms around the shorter boy:

"Merlin Potter, don't get soppy on me now."

"Shut up Malfoy. I'm so proud of you." Harry muttered into the blonde's shoulder, still grinning. He stepped back and stood next to Draco, observing the tortoise shimmering as it regarded them curiously.

"Thanks Harry." Draco grinned. "A tortoise. My Patronus is a bloody tortoise." He remarked. Harry only nodded:

"Yeah. It's perfect."

"Really? How?" Draco's brows furrowed. He didn't catch on.

"A hard shell, tough exterior, but a gentle, soft interior." Harry explained. "They shy away when they feel threatened, just like you. Hide behind the tough facade." Draco flushed once again, stuttering:

"I-I am not soft." He protested.

"You are softer than a Hufflepuff." Harry teased, eyes still trained on the tortoise.

"Am not." Draco protested again, the tips of his ears turning red. He was bloody very well not.

"You cuddled me Draco." Harry cocked an eyebrow, tilting his head at the blonde.

"I was tired. I didn't know what I was doing. Besides, you looked..scared.." The boy muttered gently, not looking at Harry. Harry merely nodded, his features softening. They'd both fallen asleep on the couch that evening, after talking for a long while and he was having a particularly nasty nightmare, but once he felt himself enveloped in comforting arms, the grizzly images were washed away, letting him have a proper sleep. Imagine his surprise when he woke up to none other than Draco Malfoy holding him. It felt more intimate than it should have, as it was only cuddling. Harry felt utterly swooned seeing Draco's sleeping face. It made for an interesting morning. Harry shook his head, focusing on the present situation:

"Which memory did it?" The raven asked, suddenly curious what was strong enough to manage a Patronus. After so many failed attempts, Harry was stunned on what it could be. Draco coughed into his fist, and stared firmly at the ground. He dispelled his Patronus and said nothing.

"C'moon, tell meee." Harry whined, poking Draco's sides like a child. It was only fair after all. He had been stuck here for a week trying to get a Patronus out of Draco, and now they did it, and Harry felt entitled to at least know what finally did it.

"Noo, it's embarrassing." Draco shook his blonde head, fidgeting with his fingers. He was absolutely not telling Harry which memory had him manage to cast his first Patronus. Never.

"It's okay. Tell meeeee!" Harry pouted, staring up at Draco through his lashes, giving him his best puppy dog eyes. Draco's stomach twisted.

"No." The taller boy remained firm. He nearly gave in to Harry's face, but he knew he'd never live it down. Harry slouched:

"Fine. Keep your secrets Malfoy." He sounded disappointed, but not upset. "Important thing is, you managed a Patronus." He smiled again.

"Yeah. I can't believe it." Draco admitted, this wholly dazed by the experience. Harry unceremoniously dropped into one of the few armchairs the RoR provided them with:

"You learned from the best." He grinned smugly.

"Don't flatter yourself, Potter." Draco teased, settling in an armchair next to Harry's graciously. Harry shrugged, then snickered:

"I always thought your Patronus would be something big and scary. Like a dragon, or a wolf. Nope, it was a tortoise. One of the sweetest creatures to walk this earth."

"Yeah, it surprised me too." Draco agreed.

"My favorite idea was your Patronus being a ferret." Harry chortled and Draco shot him a deadly glare:

"Ha-ha very funny Potter." He snarked. "Have you ever been turned into an animal?"

"No." Harry shrugged.

"Then you have no right to speak." Draco huffed, crossing his arms over his chest, much like a little kid. Harry laughed at him:

"Such a petulent child."

The blonde promptly ignored him. And he kept ignoring him, so Harry had to switch strategies. He stood up and walked to Draco's armchair.

"I will mess up your hair unless you stop ignoring me." He threatened. Draco scoffed indignantly:

"You wouldn't dare Potter."

Harry bit back a smirk, and buried both his hands into the blonde hair, ruffling and messing it thoroughly up. Draco squeaked and stood up harshly, his face dark.

"You--" He started, though he couldn't finish that sentence as he attempted to right his hair. Harry only grinned:

"I warned you. Your hair is almost as soft as the rest of you."

"I am NOT soft!" Draco protested further, seemingly giving up on his poor disheveled hair and settling for glaring at Harry. "I am a cold blooded Malfoy."

Harry cocked an eyebrow:

"Oh please. You drink chocolate milk at every meal." Harry listed a reason.

"It has a pleasant taste." Draco glared further.

"You literally melt when an animal approaches you. I saw you with Fang, you know." Harry listed another reason, smiling at the cute memory.

"Everyone loves Fang. He's a good boy." The blonde protested.

"You swoon at just about every couple you see." Harry recalled walking Draco to his next class, when they noticed two students holding hands and gazing at each other lovingly. Draco was smiling like a fool at them, attempting to subdue his smile when Harry gave him an amused look.

"I regret becoming friends with you." The blonde grumbled, bristling.

"You love me." Harry teased and plopped down into an armchair.

"Please. If anyone loves anyone, you love me Potter." Draco pointed out, sitting down himself.

"Lies. Whatever gave you that idea?" Harry waved him off.

"Literally everything you've done for me until now." He answered as if it were obvious.

"Anyone who sticks with attempting to teach me Potions for as long as you have has to love me. That's just the bitter truth Malfoy." Harry clicked his tounge.

Just as Draco was about to give a snarky, witty retort, a sudden jolt of clarity made him pause. He blinked. He stared at Harry, as if he'd never seen him before. As if he was just now noticing him. Perhaps he was. Perhaps he was truly only now noticing him properly. Another jolt racked through him, his entire body growing cold.

"Are you alright Draco?" Harry asked, taking notice of the blonde's pale face and unfocused eyes.

Draco didn't respond though. He simply kept staring blankly while the fog lifted in his head, seemingly for the first time. The surroundings faded out as the gears in his mind shifted.

'Anyone who sticks to attempting to teach me Potions for as long as you have has to love me.'

'Has to love me.'

'Love me.'

Love him? Love Harry?

"Dray you're worrying me." Harry spoke again, his worried gaze trained on Draco, though his voice sounded distant. Draco's ears were ringing. Love him? As friends? He cringed away from that notion instinctively. He felt a sudden weight in his lap and someone shaking his shoulders.

"Draco, please. You're scaring me." He heard someone speak distantly. Love Harry...

A sudden pain erupted in his cheek as his head flew to the side. Everything returned back to normal. He blinked and found that Harry was in his lap, practically straddling him while shaking his shoulders, eyes wide:

"What the hell was that? You scared me you idiot!"

Draco drew in a shallow breath. This was the first time he'd seen Harry really lose his composure.

"Hey, I'm okay. Calm down." He assured and rubbed his stinging cheek. "Didn't have to slap me."

Harry drew in a shuddering breath, his hands dropping from Draco's shoulders:

"You looked as if..as if..you were about to die..and I didn't..I couldn't..." The raven looked to be on the verge of tears.

"Harry, for Gods' sake." Draco muttered, pulling him into a hug. "I'm not going anywhere, and especially not dying. Anytime soon." He was more scared than he was letting on, for Harry's sake.

"I know. I'm sorry." Harry muttered, pulling away, and climbing off of Draco. "Just really scared me is all." He shook his head, and smiled tiredly. Draco stood up:

"Let's get out of here yeah?"

Harry just nodded and the two made their way out of the RoR, and headed back to their common room in silence. Neither really knew what to say. The silence broiled with unspoken words and shivers. Draco couldn't help but glance at Harry out of the corner of his eyes ever so often. Love Harry? A shiver went down his spine. This could not end well. No, this could only end in absolute disaster. Love Harry? How stupid. Of course not. They were friends. He needed a drink.

"Uh Harry?" He stammered.

"Yea?"

"You go on ahead. I need some fresh air." Bollocks excuse, but it was the best he had.

Considering how pale and unresponsive Draco was in the RoR, Harry could understand he'd need to clear his head a little. He just nodded, and continued on to the common room by himself.

~

Draco was gone for quite awhile, and Harry was starting to get worried. He didn't go out drinking anymore, at least to Harry's knowledge, and the raven was antsy he might've done it again for some reason. So, he stayed in the common room deep into the night, waiting. Even if he didn't drink, Harry still wanted to scold him for being gone for so long. He was growing restless, when Draco entered. Harry sprang to his feet, and his heart sank as he watched the other gripping a wall for support, his cheeks flushed from drink.

"Oh Draco.." Harry sighed and went to take a hold of him, moving him to the couch. "Why?" He asked once the dazed blonde was sitting, albeit somewhat tilted. He regarded Harry with half-lidded clouded eyes, silent for a few beats. Then he slowly spoke, drawing out his words, slurring:

"'M in love.."

Harry stopped breathing for a mere moment. Oh..Oh Merlin..Oh..That was..whoa. Draco was in love? That was lovely. Harry smiled, though some small part of him withered:

"Oh. Really?" He asked, tilting Malfoy back up properly so he didn't topple off the couch.

"'M in love with this guy and I.." He trailed off, head lolling. Oh..Well who was this guy? Harry didn't really notice Draco acting any different around any other bloke, so he was surprised to say the least:

"What's he like?" Harry asked.

"He's wonderful..treats me so well.." Draco slurred, his hair falling across his eyes. Harry reached out and brushed it away. So it was someone Draco knew then? "..better than I deserve.." He muttered. Harry scowled at this. He didn't like when Draco said things like that. Not one bit.

"Don't say that. So, it's someone you know?" Harry moved his hand back from Draco's face.

"Yeah...known him for years..been awful to him.." The drunk boy leaned back into the couch. Harry was, well, stumped. Draco was awful to pretty much everyone once upon a time. "'M sure..he doesn't feel..the same.."

"Why did you act like that?" Harry asked, unsure of what to say about all this, especially the last part.

"..Don't know..I was..bitter.." His voice was growing quieter, and Harry could tell he would drift off soon.

"About what? Who is this guy?" The raven asked.

"..he..he wouldn't shake..my hand..when I offered..to be..his friend.." And Draco was out like a light.

Harry sat there, staring at the passed out blonde, hearing his heartbeat in his ears. This..what? How much did he drink to be spouting nonsense like that? What the absolute hell? Harry wondered if he heard everything correctly. Draco was in love..with a guy..who he'd known for years..and acted awful towards..because he didn't shake his hand. There was only one guy in the entire Wizarding World that fit that description. Just one fucking person. Harry blinked. Once, twice, pinched himself, but nope, he was awake, this wasn't a dream. He quite frankly didn't believe this was real. No way. No bloody way. He ran a hand through his hair, scowling at the air. His stomach was coiling painfully, though he realized it wasn't all shock. There was..something else. Harry looked at Draco again. His head was thrown back, leaning over the couch, his pale neck bared, his entire body relaxed and loose. His hair was everywhere. A memory of pale skin and muscle from that first night flashed across his vision and Harry shook his head. If..If Draco was..really in love with Harry..what would that mean for their friendship? Harry placed a hand over his mouth as he thought. He never had any inkling of idea that Draco might've felt this way, and Harry had a feeling Draco didn't know either. He'd either only realized it today, or somewhere close to today. Else he wouldn't have drank himself silly over it. Harry could forget this night ever happened, he could carry on their friendship just as it had been until now, go through until they graduate, and then they'd go their separate ways. His entire body rejected that idea as soon as it was formed. Something was stirring. He could confront Draco tomorrow, but the blonde either wouldn't believe him, or it would create a rift between them. Harry knew Draco would distance himself, too embarrassed to function. And if he confronted him, what would he tell him? That he didn't feel the same? No, that wasn't right. At least, part of him disagreed. His mouth dried, he didn't even want to consider the implications of that. What would be the best thing to do? What did he want? Harry bit his lip and stared at the sleeping boy. What do I want? He wondered, though deep inside, he knew the answer. For so long he'd known the answer, but he never went about it right. Blindly mistook it for something different else entirely. So much stood between them for so long, of course Harry had no fucking clue. Now it was all stripped away. Houses, reputations, other people, pride, standards, masks, everything. Now it was just the barebones of the situation. And it was remarkably simple. So, so very simple. Always had been. In fact, Harry hadn't been faced with a simpler fact or a more prominent truth in his entire life. He wanted Draco Malfoy.

~

After coming to a few startling realizations, Harry carried Draco up to his room and, as usual, left him hangover potion and a note, then went to his, more than ready to sleep this off. Now, it was the next morning, and Harry didn't feel like getting out of bed. Gods. He didn't feel like facing Draco after last night. Classes seemed a foreign construct now. He simply lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, willing himself to move, but he couldn't. His limbs felt as heavy as lead. He didn't want to talk to Draco about any of this. About what he felt, what Draco felt, what the fuck they were going to do. It would be such a difficult conversation. A knock on Harry's door startled him out of his dreamy reverie.

"Come in." He murmured, voice gruff from having just woken up. The door opened and in stepped the one person Harry didn't want to see, Draco Malfoy. He closed the door behind him and faced Harry's bed. The raven sat up and rubbed his eyes, placing his glasses on his face. Harry knew he had to do it. Either do it now, or he'd lose his gall, and do it never. He swallowed the lump in his throat:

"You went drinking." He stated simply.

"I'm sorry Harry." Draco sighed, ashamed.

"Why? It's been a while." Harry asked, not upset. Only nervous. Draco bit his lip and looked everywhere but at Harry:

"I..I'd rather not.." He muttered, rubbing his neck while he shifted his weight from foot to foot. So..it was true..Harry confirmed, not at all startled anymore.

"We need to talk." He spoke and Draco shuffled over to his bed, sitting down awkwardly.

"I'm sorry about getting drunk--" Draco began but Harry shook his head.

"No, not about that. A-About..what you said..when you returned..." This was it. No going back now. Draco visibly paled and swallowed:

"What I said? What..what did I say?"

Harry braced himself for how to properly explain this, without his voice cracking.

"Right. Uhm, you might want to brace yourself. I'm certain you're not going to like this, at all." Harry warned and Draco only stiffly nodded. "Promise not to run away until I'm done talking?" Harry pleaded. If Draco ran away, it would be done. Cut.

"I p-promise." The blonde assured, biting into his lip.

"Okay. So. You said that you were in love, with a guy." Harry paused, gauging Draco's reaction. Tense as hell.

"R-Right." He pushed through his teeth.

"Which is fine of course. You said that..that you'd known him for years..and.." Harry trailed off, his face flushing as he tried to find a gentle way to break the news. "..And that you'd acted awful towards him.."

Draco looked as if he was going to be sick.

"I asked you why and.." Harry wished to bury himself in his blankets and scream. This was so awkward and difficult to say. "And you told me you were bitter that he didn't shake your hand when you offered to be his friend." Harry forced the rest of the story out, all in one sentence, no breaks or stops. Just rip off the band-aid. Harry was silent after having said that, only observed Draco, who seemed to have flushed at least 7 shades of red, his grip on the bed's edge so tight his knuckles were white. After the moment hanging in the air, Harry spoke again:

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but, I believe there's only one guy that fits that description.."

Draco only gnawed on his lip harder.

"And..you also said you were sure that he didn't feel the same..so." Harry stopped and pulled himself together. "Here he is. Telling you that..that you were wrong.." He finished, and finally dropped his eyes. "He..he feels the same."

Silence. Harry felt the bed shift, and he glanced up to see Draco standing up. He was ever so slightly trembling, looking at the wall.

"Excuse me for a moment." He squeezed out, and took a few stiff steps towards the door, stepping out without another word. Harry quickly got out of bed, not bothering with a shirt, only in his pyjama bottoms, and followed suit. He stepped out and just saw Draco entering his own room, leaving the door slightly ajar. Harry walked up to it, and peered in through the small crack. Was Draco okay? He saw the blonde sit down on his bed and start to mutter:

"OhmygodOhmygodOhmygodOhmygodOhmyfuckinggod"

"I am never drinking again. What have I done?"

"He says he feels the same."

"Jesus fucking Christ"

"I can't believe this"

"Merlin help me"

"What the hell do I tell him?"

"Oh fuck me"

Harry suppressed a grin, and gently pushed the door open a bit more, stepping into the room. Draco blinked up at him. He looked absolutely terrified. Harry shut the door behind himself and he approached Draco, kneeling down in front of him:

"Are you okay?" Harry asked first and foremost.

"I..uhm..I..I..yeah..uh.." Draco stumbled, and tripped over his words, and if Harry didn't know better, he'd assume he was drunk again, or high. Or both.

"Calm down. Take a deep breath. Talk to me." Harry instructed, smiling softly. Draco nodded mutely, and did just what Harry had told him.

"So.." He started and Harry smiled:

"So."

"Now what?" Draco asked.

Harry sat back on his legs:

"What do you want?"

Draco swallowed and his cheeks dusted pink:

"Well..I want a lot of things.."

"Right now?" Harry inquired. Draco ran a hand through his hair:

"Right now..I want to kiss you.."

Harry's cheeks flushed and he bit back his grin. He leaned closer to Draco, stopping when their noses were almost touching. The look in Draco's eyes was touching, deep and wanton. Harry felt the anticipation coil in his stomach. Then, Draco closed his eyes and leaned the rest of the way in, connecting their lips.

~

_Fin._


End file.
